dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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