ugly people sure do ruin things
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
