I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
