The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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