hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
