I love black thongs
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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