in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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