She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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