how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
