so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
