i just wanna soil my oats bro
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Sorry about my life...
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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