it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
