i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
