Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Found the puke drawer
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
