What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
