Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
