Sry I called you an 8
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He keeps bees of course he's weird
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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