If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
