yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Randomize
