I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
he thought i was a dude.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
