she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
