if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
