everyone is single if you try hard enough
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
