I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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