You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
