and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
She made me pour olive oil on her.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
