Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
