Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Is Oprah even human
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
