told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
