I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize