I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
