how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Is that strawberry winking at me??
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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