am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Randomize
