Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
