i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
