Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We don't watch enough power rangers
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
