What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
