please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
