how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
