He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize