I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
