Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
