evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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