So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
