her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
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