And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
