So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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