he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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