Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
false alarm, still single
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