You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
